Smart Slut 2… Love will not keep you HIV free

By | April 28, 2011

Most of the HIV positive people I know became infected in the course of a relationship.

After talking with a good friend from overseas, I was informed of this incredible theory. My brilliant ally and I discussed at length the risks people are willing to take and for what reason.

The mutually agreed upon theory is as follows: People will take greater risks in the context of a relationship because the assumption is that since we now have added love to the mix, we have more than enough information to trust our paramour.

Condom and lube with cloudsThis is in direct contrast to not knowing or trusting a “trick” which means we better be on guard for any bit of foolishness (ours and theirs) that might occur.

Personally, I have been willing to take unbelievable and highly stupid risks with people that I was in “love” with. I have had unprotected sex . I have been lied to and yet was willing to engage in sexual activity with the person lying to me.

I could have easily been affected and was not. My initial HIV test was very traumatic.

After listening to several people tell me that I should be tested, I could find no one to go with me for the long dramatic walk to get tested and receive the results.

I went alone.

One of the main things that I gleaned from this experience was the knowledge that love would not save me. At 23, I was sexually involved with a (positive) partner and was unaware of this frightening reality for a year.

When I found out, I couldn’t believe that this was happening.

This frightening reality would prompt my initial HIV test and a complete immersion into the world of smart slutdom. I could have played the victim role and said poor me what will I do now ? .. Blah blah, blah.

Instead, I obsessively gathered information about how people become infected and how to both prevent infection and not give up sex . In other words, through this horrible incident and life altering experience, the smart slut emerged.

Here’s my advice: Look at and use absolutely everything for your growth and development.

Know that you can be sexually free and socially responsible.

Know that sex is good and is God’s greatest creation since chocolate.

Understand that you are not a victim and can consistently and creatively make choices that enhance your life. Familiarize yourself with decisions that allow you to stay healthy, happy and productive.

2 thoughts on “Smart Slut 2… Love will not keep you HIV free

  1. geraldine

    I really enjoyed reading this blog and can not wait to read the others

    Reply
  2. david halladay

    Being with a ‘love’ and being in a marriage are two different things. We promised several things and monogamy was one of those. trust is part of our relationship. As we seek equality, we also need to seek the responsibilities that go with it. Trust is just one part of that equality and I prefer to try the trust route.

    Reply

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