Tag Archives: bell hooks

Can Gay Men be Friends ?

Growing up and coming out, I constantly heard very interesting messages regarding friendships between men and women. The message was loud and clear and annoying: they don’t work. I thought this was interesting and often wondered why people would make such assumptions. Then of course, I grew up and started dating men and to some… Read More »

Why Black and White Relationships should matter to everyone

I’m a basic mutt Euro-American male. I was adopted and raised from infancy in a very loving, inter-cultural family (a European/African-American household in 1970’s surburban Los Angeles). As such, loving, supportive and long-lasting interracial relationships are all I have ever really known and seen exemplified in my life. I have always remained pretty much quiet… Read More »

Moving beyond Fetish… The opportunities for growth and joy via black and white gay male relationships

I have spent half of my dating life with white men. As far as I can see, there is a great deal of confusion and mayhem regarding how these seemingly divergent groups get along, partner up and develop loving, committed non exploitative relationships. What is this thing we call attraction ? Is it learned ?… Read More »

Black, Gay and building community (VIDEO)

As gay men, any and all attempts to build community puts a nail in the coffin of domination, coercion and exploitation. Within the world that relies and feeds on isolation, we offer it a great big kick in the pants when we refuse to “go away”, be silenced or allow ourselves the privilege of second… Read More »

Smart Slut 3… The decision to be victorious

My new favorite past time is falling in love with men’s potential. Instead of taking an honest look at what a person presents as their true self, I like the big game of pretend. Basically, I wasn’t very bright and instead of examining my choices regarding my health and well being , I decided to… Read More »