Welcome to another edition of Visionaries and Truthtellers. Please join me as I chat with super Social Change Agent, Nehemiah Frank. Mr. Frank discusses education, black youth, Tulsa and Black Wall Street and what we can all contribute to make this country more compassionate.
For the last year, I have developed a healthy and in some cases obsessive focus on systems- how they work; how they get created; who determines if it is time for an update. Everything is systems based and success and failure is highly determined by an individuals level of self discipline within the system of… Read More »
Yesterday, my man beat me…Again. In Scrabble. The final portion of creating a successful relationship is the ability to learn from each other daily. Many couples meet and silently agree that neither will change no matter the amount of time spent together or the circumstances that would invite and encourage change. If you want the… Read More »
Celibacy is Unrealistic Gay men are taught that everything must be handled sexually. Celibacy is a wonderful way for gay men to handle emotional needs without sexual activity. We are not encouraged to seek counsel to deal with our problems in ways that require silence, contemplation or self- reflection. We are supported in using one… Read More »
During our lives, we will meet several people. Some of these folks we will know a lifetime. Some folks will be around for a good time and then dash when the first sign of trouble presents itself. I have had several acquaintances and very few true friends. True friends can save your life or at… Read More »
When I announced my pending marriage more than four months ago , my family was very vocal with their disapproval. Some of the bullshit I heard was just mesmerizing. “You don’t know him that well”. “Nobody in our family has met him and You are making a big mistake are a few of the brilliant… Read More »
When I attempted to reconcile a doomed relationship for the third time in five years, my heart was broken and my mind was fried. I already knew the answer to the question “can this relationship be saved ?” No. It can’t. As black gay men, we get inducted into a lifetime of disappointment at a… Read More »
“All of life’s important decisions are made without enough information, and coming out is no exception. We make our decisions based upon predictions about how our lives will be affected by the possible outcomes.” Olson p. 67
For a very long time, I have been obsessed with long term “happy” life-enhancing relationships.
Every time someone that I deeply care for says, “I love you”, I get frightened. It makes little sense to get shook up regarding this most basic of human needs and the thing myself and we all want the most. And yet, when it is stated it becomes a thing of suspicion. My personal experience… Read More »